Sunday, January 8, 2012


Manhattan's Golden Sonrise - Riley
December 30, 1997-January 8, 2012

Riley is at peace. I know he's at peace. I held his head and watched him relax while taking his final breath. My head knows our family made the right decision.

Riley has spent the past two weeks laying on the same blankets in the same spot. We kept pushing water though he ate very little. His muscles atrophied. He probably had pain in his hips. He leaned and walked to the right leaving us to believe he probably had a stroke.

This is not the quality of life he was accustomed to - he no longer slept upstairs with us nor had he followed us around the house.

Yes we know. It doesn't make the heart hurt any less. We've lost a dear member of our family. But he's at peace.

Sunday, January 1, 2012


January 1st. A day for reflection for many. I look back over the past couple of years and have few regrets. I faced 2010 determined to improve my physical self. This road encountered a couple of obstacles - mainly a boot and foot surgery. Recovery was slow and steady. The physical regime continues... after all I didn't get this way overnight and I'm determined it will get better and stay that way.
In 2011 I decided to accept the things over which I have no control. It's a mantra I have been repeating to myself often. It applies to so many aspects. I cannot force people to like me or accept me and their choices do not make me a bad person. It took longer to resolve this in my heart as it involved something I've been trying to create for many years. Understanding that because I wanted it, didn't make it something others wanted, was a big step for me. It also meant moving on.

2011 was an exciting year. We reunited with the Oregon Shaws at our little slice of heaven on the WA coast. We spent time with our DIL and Grands and welcomed a new Great! I was fortunate to spend time with my folks, brother, sister and her family. I'm thankful my parents are in good health and my sister and I stay close in touch. We officially welcomed Chris into our family (as well as his parents and sister too). We tried to make time for our family and dear friends whenever possible.

I also made a decision to leave a job where I was comfortable, but unhappy, for a new position where I am challenged. I'm thankful for former coworkers who are dear enough to stay remain in touch.

Now we have 2012 upon us. I feel I need to continue the physical improvements to my half-century (plus) old body. It's for my own health after all.

I feel it's important to continue the focus on our family time together - finding ways to make memories for all of us. Especially since we have another wedding to celebrate!

AND... I will remind myself daily to accept that which I have no control and nurture healthy relationships.