Into 2009...

New Years Resolutions! Ugh! People become fanatical about making changes. Grandious plans emerge from formerly rational people. Suddenly you see yourself svelt, tone and tan in the summer bathing suit. Your routine will no longer be something just shy of chaos. Family schedules will be organized. No event will be forgotten or missed and no one will arrive late or pick up forgotten. Your children will be well schooled, well adjusted and well behaved simply because they have followed your example. And then you wake up from your dream...

I am no different. I continue my ongoing battle of the bulge (which I realistically know will not depart without effort on my part). I don't anticipate rapid weight loss - just slow and steady. It's been a slow process. I can no longer claim it as 'baby fat'. People caught on when they met my nearly 21 year old 'baby'. One day at a time... one pound at a time.

I will continue relationships with family who reach back. I know better than to say "I don't care". I do care, more then many understand. I care about having our extended family be close - but I do not have the control to change things. I have allowed it to bother me for too many years. Instead, I will return phone calls, answer emails and write a few extra letters to family and friends. It's only fair. It's the same courtesy I hope others will extend to us. It's now time to stop sending gifts that go unacknowledged. Time to save myself the time, expense, frustration and heartache. I cannot force others to desire what is in my heart.

I will dig deep to find an optimistic approach to life. I once read in "The Secret" how positive thinking can manifest itself into your life. I've seen how negativity escalates to the point where you feel like everything you touch is going to pieces - like you've let your family down. It's time to regain what I've lost - my positive outlook and my faith.

Here we go... baby steps into 2009! God bless everyone.