And so it begins...

January. The first month of a new year. This is the last year of the decade (though it's been said it's the first). I turn 50 this year and for some perverse reason I'm excited about this event.

Perhaps I'm happy to be the first of my siblings to reach this milestone. Duh. I'm the oldest. Maybe because soon my mother will have to admit her oldest child is FIFTY YEARS OLD! No matter - Come July I will have survived a half a century. Wow! It's an amazing feat when I stop and ponder some of the not-so-intellectual things I've managed to get myself into.

Last year was a very emotionally trying year. We inched our way, passing the days one at a time, with a renewed outlook and strength and guidance we received from God.

This year I want the changes to be physical. I've slowly been shedding a few pounds here and there. My chin has fewer friends. I've reduced a size in my slacks. It's time to take this a step further. I have six months. Realistically my goal is 50 lbs. but my ultimate goal is 70 less Deb pounds.

I joined a team of 13 people from work and signed up to participate in the Treasure Valley Weight Loss Challenge. There are very large monetary prizes. I figure it couldn't hurt to see what happens.

Mike and I rejoined the YMCA. I enjoyed the Total Body Conditioning class from last spring but even more have enjoyed my new evening routine of walking on the treadmill and catching my favorite 9pm TV show. There are so many options and with my varied work schedule I need to find a routine.

Tonight I stepped outside of the box and tried the Eliptical Machine. I've spent two days watching this little anorexic, hyperactive adult/child fling her skinny wing-like arms and bird legs for 30 minutes so thought I'd give it a try. I didn't last long - the 'burn' was quickly a sharp pain in my knee. Good thing Mike set us up with an appointment this week for 'how to' instructions on the machines. In no time I'll be burning away the calories and doing my best to keep my not so skinny wing-like arms from flopping in the wind like a flag. Ideally we should have taken advantage of our youngest's month long home visit and thrice weekly trips to the Y to work out. Can't you just imagine how excited he would be to give instruction to his uncoordinated mom?! I can see his eyes rolling from here!

Yes - to quote the Momma who just left the Biggest Loser tonight - when I'm done you will see a new, sexy senior citizen... ok so I'll just be happy with less.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

It's truly been a year for the books and we couldn't be happier to close this final chapter and welcome in 2010!

A good friend compared our events to waves of the ocean. I'm happy to share we've learned to swim! We've endured health trouble and legal drama and found a family bond that will not break.

Not all of our efforts have ended positive with our family members but when one door closes another opens. We can testify that relationships are worth the work to stay in touch and spend time together. We cannot force something we desire if another's heart does not feel as we do. I think just realizing this has been a big step.

Thank you to our friends and family who have stood by our side. Thank you for the hugs, the phone calls, the texts and the emails, all to make sure we were doing well and feeling strong. God is good and we are grateful that no matter how low we felt we found the strength to maintain and move forward.

We are grateful for the opportunities to spend with family we've had this year - our Oregon/Idaho/Washington group return to Kalaloch, my parent's 50th anniversary in Wisconsin in June and Spring Break with our Texas family. We hope you are able to fill your Christmas with new memories.

We pray all are blessed through this holiday season and throughout the new year.

Thanks(and)Giving

We all have much to be thankful for every day of the month... this will be my reminder for the rest of the year when I need it.
November 1st - I am thankful for the change in seasons. Though the plants and trees are 'going to sleep' around me - they do so with such dramatic flair. I love the Fall colors found in the leaves, the harvest and the mountains that surround our city.
November 2nd - I am thankful for the technology we have to help women find early stages of Breast Cancer.
November 3rd - I'm thankful for my day off work and the chance to sleep away the weariness I feel.
November 4th - I'm thankful for the smiles on our youngest grandson's face.
November 5th - I'm thankful to have a job... though I'd rather have the day off!
November 6th - I'm thankful for FRIDAY! Wahooooo!
November 7th-8th - I'm thankful for the weekend and the opportunity to work on some overdue projects around the house.
November 9th - It's Monday. I find myself struggling to be thankful and giving when patients come in late and want it to be my fault. I guess I'm thankful for patience and a filter to my thoughts.
November 10th - I'm thankful for hugs that 2-1/2 year old boys share. (Warm Fuzzies)
November 11th - I'm thankful for our active duty service members, law enforcement and Veterans - who, through their dedication and devotion to duty, provide the freedoms we all enjoy.
November 12th - I'm thankful for my sister Diana. Happy Birthday-Love you Sis! Wish I were able to spend the day with you.November 13th - I'm thankful I'm not superstitious... I love Friday the 13th!
November 14th - I'm thankful for a quiet evening, slippers and the fireplace.November 15th - I'm thankful for our older grands. Despite the fact Kalen cheers for a losing football team and Naidia worked a long day, they still text and IM their Gramma Deb.November 16th - I'm thankful to be able to plan a trip to San Diego in March to visit friends and watch UI lacrosse.
November 17th - I'm thankful for my husband who gets up with me in the morning (though he doesn't have to) despite the fact I'm not a morning person. I have a ten hour day and the coffee tastes divine!
November 18th - I'm thankful to be part of a team which provides mammograms in rural communities. The women we meet are all so appreciative. Me hace felicidad a formar parte de este grupo.
November 19th - I am thankful for sunshine, cartoons with Taten and the time at home to enjoy it all.
November 20th - I am thankful our youngest son is coming home today to spend Thanksgiving week in Boise. We will have all of our family together.

November 21st - I am thankful for doctors who work on Saturday and fast working antibiotics!

November 22nd - I am thankful for the opportunity to share Sunday night Mass with Mike and our youngest son Krieg.

November 23rd - I am thankful for a relaxing weekend, enjoying time spent with our sons - while Brit and I anxiously await the arrival of Erin to even the gender scale!

November 24th - I am thankful our daughter Erin and Chris arrived safe today. Let the festivities begin!

November 25th - I am thankful! Our home is full. Erin & Brit were prepping the side dishes today while I work - so we may all relax tonight!

November 26th - I am so thankful to be blessed with such a special family... Our children, Mike's children, our daughters-in-law, grands, my parents, siblings and family! It's been a rocky year - a few health issues, relationship struggles and tests of our strength and beliefs but with the love and support of our close family and friends we've endured. We really enjoyed our family date - watching "New Moon".

November 27th - I am thankful to have the opportunity to see Black Friday for myself - with Krieg and Brit. We are downsizing gift giving and had three things we hoped to find and afford. We were successful!

November 28th - I am thankful we've had such a special Thanksgiving weekend with Erin, Krieg and Chris. Our time together went entirely too fast. We are also very thankful for neighbors who still smile and wave while trying to back out of their driveways and manuever through our street corner, despite our small parking lot while everyone was home.

November 29th - I am thankful for a day of rest.

November 30th - I am thankful to have had the past 30 days to stop long enough to remind myself all I have to be thankful for - especially when I need the nudge.

Tis the season - Trick or Treat

For many years, Halloween season began with a trip to the pumpkin patch. I do miss the trips to the farms in the Midwest where we were treated to horse driven hay rides, endless fields of pumpkins, hot apple cider and caramel apples to die for...

Fortunately we've adapted to our environment and located an Idaho version - complete with Corn Maze, tractor pulled wagons and pumpkins in a large field. Taten enjoyed a tent filled with farm animals to feed (and a camel?). We came home with a porch full of Fall color.

Finally the night comes to show Taten how to carve the pumpkins. Matt & Brit are creative souls with ideas (and an internet website with designs). By the time Grammy is going to put the knife to a pumpkin she's thinking past creative to clean-up, hot shower and bed. The kids made these delightfully adorable faces - I managed to come up with a large spider.

Halloween night arrived with cooler temperatures but that did not deter the trick or treaters. Taten wasn't a happy camper when he departed the house but I was confident once he figured out the whole candy routine he'd be up and running - and he was literally running from house to house with his parents and friends in tow.

Matt & Brit even took advantage of Halloween and attended a going away party in costume. They were quite a stunning pair. Of course Erin (and her roommates) and Krieg in Moscow were not to be outdone. Just Papa and Grammy home holding down the fort!

Weekend in Heaven

Wahoooo! We are on our way...

Oh my - Forks, WA - maybe we'll see Edward!

Having chosen to forego our week-long camping trip at our favorite place on the Washington Coast this past summer, we opted to have a family weekend in same said same heavenly location. It was sooo worth the wait!

I managed to pick the one weekend in October that didn't have seventeen other things scheduled. No lacrosse tournaments, no midterm exams, no unexpected illnesses and best of all NO RAIN!

Mike picked me up after work Thursday evening and we drove as far as the Olympia area to spend the night with our daughter-in-law Debbie. Matt, Brit and Taten followed us over in their car too. It was a late arrival but so much nicer to be able to get up "almost there" and have a leisurely morning.

Our oldest granddaughter Andi arrived, helped with some last minute food prep and we loaded coolers into cars to head for the coast. Our crew in Moscow finished up their morning classes and were able to hit the road in the afternoon "island time". Even the Oregon family hit the road to join in on the weekend. We were 19 Shaws in total.

We had sporadic rain on the drive over - but it cleared after we had the cars unpacked. Just in time to hit the beach. The crew from Moscow had rain showers, and a delay from an accident which stopped traffic on the interstate for over an hour. They arrived in time for a bowl of chili to warm their tummies and low tide at 11:30pm. The young adults promptly took off to enjoy the beach after dark (while their more chronologically advanced cabin mates went to bed).

We woke Saturday to SUNSHINE! It was a stunning day. I don't think we could have requested anything nicer. As our family walked on the beach, enjoying the warm sunshine, looking for agates, we reminisced about visits to Kalaloch over the years. The two littlest guys found walking sticks like the big boys, and tossed large rocks into the surf. The little girls followed them around, cooing and being attentive. The air was warm - sweatshirts were sufficient to keep comfortable.

The evening passed with delicious bowls of chicken n'dumplings (a Kalaloch tradition), glasses of wine & beer, laughter, conversations among family members, card games, board games, way too much candy, chips & cookies. I'll be detoxing the month of November just to survive the holidays.

(L) Portland Shaws 

(R) Idaho Shaws

Sunday morning came before any of us were ready to leave. Our weekend together passed quickly and the time spent together was precious. After breakfast, we packed up our cars and headed for home. Our family made one last visit to Beach 2 - where Mike's parents cremains were scattered.

Kalaloch 2009

We'll pray God will find us, together, back on the beaches in July.

Sneaking Sundaes

Taten disappeared the other night, into the kitchen. We listened carefully - on alert for impending disaster. We heard a kitchen drawer open and silverware being handled. Next noise was the sound of the refrigerator door opening and closing.

He arrived in the living room and settled in with his ice cream and spoon.

After a couple of bites he stopped to see that we were watching. Being the strict disciplinarian that I am, I was hiding behind the pillow to keep Tate from seeing me giggling at his actions.

Our presence didn't seem to deter his desire for dessert.

And for the record, Papa isn't much better at keeping Taten in line... He asked how the ice cream tasted and got a big "thumbs up"!

Happy Birthday Erin Corinne!

Today Erin turns 26 years old. I want to be cliche and say "how did she get to be this age" but a glance in my mirror reminds me of the path.

Erin is our first born and only daughter. She's not the only daughter as she has two older half sisters. She's not the oldest child as she has four older half siblings. In our household, Erin was raised knowing her older siblings are just that - older siblings.

Erin was born at Lemoore Naval Air Station in Lemoore, California. She was born on Friday September 16th at 8:50am, my smallest baby weighing in at 9 lbs. 8-1/2 oz. The day of my 9 month prenatal checkup, the doctor informed us he was leaving town for the upcoming weekend and wanted to let us know who would be covering for him. I recall being asked to sit and not being comfortable as I was sure I had lost bladder control - I was leaking. Instead we discovered my water had broken and her arrival was destined.

Dad was the Commanding Officer of VA-146. We were loyal fans of the squadron football team. The night I was admitted to the hospital there was a game scheduled. Though I tried to convince the hospital staff I'd behave, I remained confined while my husband wandered across the street to the field!

The Flight Surgeon assigned to Dad's squadron routinely offered to be available to deliver Erin when the time came. In the morning hours, we approached the final stages and in walks Mike, ready to pinch hit. At that time I wasn't too concern about the social ramifications of having Mike so near Erin's destination and then nonchalantly chat over a glass of wine at the next squadron party! Fortunately our real doctor was present.

Nanny (my mother-in-law) was already staying with us. She was our first visitor. Denie (my mom) and Great-Great (my grandma) flew in when Erin was a week old. Imagine my grandmother experiencing her first airplane flight at the age of 81 just to come see us. It made my heart soar to have them visit. Erin is my mom's first grandchild and shares my grandmother's name for her middle name.

Erin was an easy baby, thankfully since Mike went to sea for six weeks when she was 2 weeks old. She loved laying on her belly to stretch her arms and legs out and rock.

When we moved to San Diego, her long awaited hair became white blond and very curly. She loved playing outdoors. We spent hours visiting the zoo and Sea World. Our special neighbors looking out for Erin and I while Mike came and went.

When we were scheduled to move again, I sold our home and we moved in with Denie & Granpas in Wisconsin. Dad caught up with us and we moved to Virginia. We learned our way around the D.C. area with the help of Uncle Knobs, Auntie-Mommy and Stephen. Matthew was born in Virginia.

Erin was afraid of the seasonal thunderstorms, lightening in particular. I remember one bedtime Dad telling her stories and showing her how the lightening was like static by rubbing a blanket into his hair and showing her the static sparks in the dark room.

Erin started a Montessori preschool in Venezuela. She had a wonderful International mix of students and teachers. Two years later she started Kindergarten at a British school where classes were taught in English and the playground was Spanglish. I recall her first day when the bus came to pick her up for school. She headed out our gate, waving good-bye in her little uniform. I was so fearful for the uncertainty of her arrival at the new school I insisted Mike follow the bus to school before he went to work. I wanted to know for sure someone was there to meet her and she wouldn't be scared. Of course that's exactly how the school staff greeted the new students.

When our youngest son Krieg was due to arrive the kids and I returned to Wisconsin. Erin and I attended a Sibling Class. She learned about the birth process and was allowed to bring home a very anatomically correct pregnant "mommy" rag doll. I will never forget the shocked expression on Denie's face when Erin showed her how Mommy would have contractions and eat ice chips and then (reaching under the dress) pulled out a stuffed newborn baby from the rag doll womb connected to an umbilical cord and placenta.

Our tour in Venezuela was cut short during another stateside visit. Rioting and a coup attempt occurred while we were visiting Mike's family in Washington. The kids and I weren't allowed to return to the country so Mike went back alone. Erin finished Kindergarten at the same school I once attended.

Our family has a favorite spot on the Washington coast - Kalaloch. The kids and I traveled to coast with Dad's parents before our move to Puerto Rico. They were very excited to look for egg-lets (agates) with Papo on the beach. However, Erin was concerned about our plans to hike in the woods. She was afraid the indidums (indians) would be a problem. It was a great visit.

In Puerto Rico, our arrival was followed by Hurricane Hugo. Mike was second in command for all the Caribbean bases and required to be at work during the storm. For 18 hours we listened to the roar of the wind and watched water seep through windows. The kids read books, played quietly and were very brave. Inside MY heart was racing!

Erin had a "thoughtful spot" near our home - a bench which overlooked the cliff out into the Caribbean. It was common to see her sitting out there, just watching the waves or boats, and enjoying the sea breeze across her face.

I remember a spelling bee in which Erin participated. She had no trouble spelling words and we knew she would do well. She worked her way through several levels and suddenly spelled a word incorrect. I couldn't believe - she knew that word! She happily took her consolation prize (a Tootsie pop sucker) and sat with her classmates. It wasn't until years later I learned from her she deliberately misspelled the word wrong because she saw the others getting a treat and she wanted one too!

We returned to the states when Dad retired. Erin once again returned to my former elementary school. It's difficult in a small town to be someone other than "the new person", even when it was my home town. Erin had lots of friends through Girl Scouts and 4-H. We lived close to Denie & Granpas. Eventually Dad took a job up near Green Bay and we followed. Erin thrived in her new, bigger, Middle School. High School years were spent going from one activity to another - swimming, life guarding, teaching swim lessons, church activities, CCD, Brigade... I loved working at the high school and being near Erin and her friends. So much life - so much fun.

Once more, Dad took a job and we were moving, this time to Boise, ID. Erin was looking for colleges, debating over Wisconsin schools and a Colorado veterinary tech school. I opened up the options by completing a couple of applications for her. Imagine her surprise when she learned she'd been accepted to University of Idaho but didn't recall applying. I told her there was no way the umbilical cord would stretch so would she please move with us.

University of Idaho is six hours away. Far enough for Erin to become independent but close enough to come home for the weekend. She started with a veterinary science major. Her first Spring Break, we girls took off to Oregon and Washington on a road trip. We visited the Portland Zoo - in the rain, shopped in Seattle with Debbie & Andi - and even got our first tattoos!

After a difficult semester her sophomore year (after 9-11 and Dad losing his job) Erin took a break from school to work for a year and a half. She was ready to return - and chose to go back to U of I. She changed her major to Wildlife Resource Management.

So many years being away from her brothers, Erin was excited to learn Krieg was moving north to go to school at U of I. She has become the loudest UI Lacrosse fan and can finally prove she's not lying when she tells people at 5'10" she's still the runt of the family. She stays close in contact with Matthew & Britnee - frequently catching up on the phone inbetween visits together.
Her school life was complicated by a demanding boyfriend who tore away at her self esteem. Eventually she found the strength to walk away from a debilitating relationship, move out on her own and started anew. We are so proud of Erin's willingness to seek the advice of counselors and family. We are happy to see her self esteem return along with the friends who were chased away. Erin is a strong minded, independent young woman and knows what she wants to do. The negative lifestyle of a person she's left behind is not forgotten. Signs of his existence appear but she's determined to no longer give him the power to control her life. For this we are ever grateful.

It's been a rough road. After changing majors, the school curriculum changed, adding to her required courses. At the suggestion of her advisor she requested to have her record cleared of the bad grades. The Board listened to her story and agreed to clear an entire year of poor academics. It isn't every day you get a chance at a 'do over'. Erin is determined to make the most of this opportunity. Of course it means a 'do over' on the good grades from that year too. If all continues to go well Erin will be able graduate in December 2011 - graduating with two majors - one in Wildlife Resource Management and a second in Ichthyology (fish).

We know you will continue to do great Erin. You are an amazing young woman. You've overcome obstacles and learned much about your self during some tough soul searching. We are proud of you Boo.

We love you!