Motorcycle Gramma

Making it around the corner & staying upright!

My impression of a 'Shriner' in a parade!

I have to admit. Years ago as Matt & Krieg developed teenage-boy interest in motorcycle riding I had no desire to play. I have always been very content with riding on the back of Mike's motorcycle. I'm not sure how it started... maybe one of the boys thought it would be funny to dare Mom to ride a bike. We have several couple friends who ride together. Perhaps my curiosity got the best of me this year or at my age I caved to peer pressure. I finally decided to sign up for the STAR motorcycle course. There is a waiting list so I signed up in August for a course this weekend. I didn't think too much of it until this week when suddenly my weekend was booked solid with a 3 day course. I was very nervous.

Friday night was simply class room. I walked in with absolutely no idea how to drive a motorcycle. NONE. A blank canvas. I knew there was a lot of multi tasking and hand and feet moving... The boys all told me we would start to go over the book and than 'ride the desk'. Step by step, engaging our desk clutch, gears, brakes, etc. We started through the chapters covering what to wear (it's important to be fashionably safe), rules of the road, where things are on the bike and a vague diagram. I kept waiting for the desk riding. I knew this was going to be my salvation. I would at the very least have an idea how my hands and feet were going to work together to make this vehicle move forward AND remain upright. The instructor dismissed us and I panicked. He said we would meet outside on the range at 7:45 in the morning next to the bikes. What?! I didn't get to drive my desk and in the morning I was going to have to actually drive the bike. I called Matthew on the way home to point out he led me astray. He talked me down off the ledge and suggested I go to the garage and have Mike help me identify everything. Sound advice from the kid who recently learned about gravity!

Saturday morning bright and early I was standing on the range. The weather was cold but dry. We lucked out. Rain was threatening for later in the day. We were assigned a motorcycle. I didn't get a 'big girl model', there were no automatics AND someone removed all the training wheels. They were all small Suzuki or Kawasaki 125 or 250's. We learned to straddle walk the bikes, letting the clutch out and walking our way back and forth across the range. Feel the burn... Finally we lifted our feet and used the hand and foot brakes while letting the clutch out and applying the throttle. I couldn’t believe I was doing it. I proudly 'press down all four' - squeeze in the clutch, apply the hand brake, use the foot brake and down shift... and remembered to set a foot on terra firma! We worked our way through so many different skills. Swerving around cones, turning sharp corners, turning wide corners, abrupt stops... and shifting! We even got up to 3rd gear a couple of times! We actually put 10 miles on the bikes - making circles and figure 8's. whoo hooo.

The afternoon we had more classroom review. When we were done I was physically and mentally exhausted and slightly high from inhaling exhaust fumes. Four hours in the cold outdoors and than a nice, warm classroom. A hot shower was in my near future.

The bikes were just the right size - if you were 5' or under or have a 30" inseam. I struggled to keep my foot from stepping on the brake when I didn't want it to step and get my boot back out from under the gear lever after shifting. They told us it was mental muscles... but I had some aches and pains in other areas.

Sunday morning I was back on the range by 7:35 in multiple layers to be warmer and my rain gear. It was misting. More skills to learn. My brake foot was cramping because of the angle I had to hold my foot to keep it off the brake. My shoulders were screaming from tension. Myhips wanted a reprieve. tried to slide back on the seat readjusting the 'muscle memory' I learned yesterday. By noon when we got to the skill test it was raining. I'm actually grateful to have had the experience of riding in the rain. I survived my first and second skid and slide and never dropped the bike.

After lunch we went back to the classroom for more book-learning and our written test. I am proud to say I passed both - first with an 85% on the road test and a 90% on the written test. Now I review the motorcycle handbook for DMV, wait to get my certificate in the mail and go take the written test at DMV. It will apply a motorcycle endorsement to my drivers license to make it legal to ride in Idaho. Of course it's November so practice time is limited. The 'boys' think we should have his and her HOGS. Ha. I know that's code for 'if Mom buys a bike we can ride it'. I mostly wanted to take this course so I would be prepared if something ever happened when we were on the road and I had to help out. Who knows? Maybe someday I'll feel way confident and decide to be a motorcycle gramma. For now I'm content on the back seat... where I can sleep when I get tired. Meanwhile my husband hasn't stopped grinning at me. I think he's proud!

I feel good. Out of 12 students 6 were women. 2 rode automatic scooters (excuse me?), 2 had previous experience when they were younger driving motorcycles, 2 of us had no experience other than riding. I know one woman didn't pass. I felt SO intimidated by the entire course. I'd probably jump up and down to celebrate if I didn't hurt so much!

November 5, 2008

It's the day after our Presidential Election. I state for the record I did not vote for our president elect.Our family had differing opinions over who should carry our nation forward. I voted by absentee ballot several weeks ago. I was certain of my decision. I too want change. I am not pleased with our present national crisis. I wanted to have a leader with experience, foresight and pride in our country. I did not need additional time to ponder who would receive my vote.

The reasons for my choice seemed rational, as I know my family members believed in their selection. I'm proud my children all participated. I'm proud everyone has the ability to make their own choice. I'm proud we have the freedom to be a democracy.

I'll be honest. I'm concerned. I love my country. I love telling folks I was born on the 4th of July. I tear up when I hear the National Anthem. I proudly hold my hand to my chest in salute of our American flag. At the age of 17, I chose to serve my country and when my service was complete I followed my best friend in life across the United States, to South American and the Caribbean, in support of his service to our country. We made sacrifices. We spent a lot of birthdays, anniversaries and holidays apart while he defended our rights. My heart swells when I think of our young children holding their chubby, little hands to their heart when the flag would pass in front of them.

I wanted to elect a president who shared my pride. I wanted a president who's family was proud to be American and proud of what our flag stands for. There is so much animosity among our younger generations. They are being raised during a time of war. They are being called upon to fight for our country. They are scared. I wanted a president who is someone our younger generations will look up to for leadership, guidance, and example.

I know God will guide us through the difficult transition period. I have faith that God has brought us to this point for a purpose. Everything happens for a reason. This has been my personal mantra for years. I believe God must have a reason. Perhaps as a society we've become too obsessed with material matters and we need to rethink our priorities. Perhaps God is asking us to look deep into our hearts to what is important.

Our own family was faced with reprioritizing several years ago when we moved and lost the job that brought us to our new state. As a family we chose to dig deep, cut back and remain where we were. We downsized our home, drove less expensive vehicles and worked jobs which may not have been the most desirable, until we were able to get our feet back on the ground. We learned the difference between wants vs needs. There have been no cruises, no long vacations. When we are able, we gather together at our favorite ocean site, we split expenses with the larger family group combining valuable time together with relaxation. We saved to ensure annual visits to see my parents as I know they will not be around forever. We are closer as a result.

My fear of all things Muslim influenced my choice of presidential candidates. I do realize that not all Muslims are radical fanatics. I pray to God our president elect will open my mind to understand that which I do not know.

Declining investments, decreased housing values and lack of jobs are concerns for everyone right now. I pray we will continue to find a means to assist our college bound children while they attend public state schools. If it weren't for financial aid and student loans this would not be possible. Our hard saved investments for this purpose disappeared after 9-11. I pray the economy improves enough when our children graduate they'll be able to pay back those loans and still get by. I pray our son and his wife are able to support their family and have housing of their own soon.

Change is inevitable - and necessary. I pray our Nation's choice for change proves my fears to be invalid and I can say "I was wrong". I pray our future president has the forethought to accept the guidance of those with more experience around him, to assist in making the right decisions to lead our Nation.

God bless America.

Empty Nesting

Dear Kids,

You've left home. Your parents are without adult supervision. Have you ever wondered what your parents are doing at home, all alone, when you move out?

Despite the long, empty hours wandering aimlessly through the rooms of our home, pining away for the gentle, calming of our children's voices, we are managing!

Love,

Mom & Dad

My Life is a List!

Put gas in car. Finish book. Make grocery list. Wrap gifts. Laundry. Take donations to Youth Ranch. Call Linda. Motorcycle class. Answer emails. Oil changed in car. New garage door opener. Take a nap if it feels right. Finish magazine article. Iron slacks. Buy airline tickets. Sort pictures. Rake leaves. Take seams in on pants. Cats need shots updated. Dig out edging around trees in back yard. Pick up prescriptions for Mike. Clean kitchen cupboards. Mending. Paint laundry room. Clean out pantry. Invitation list. Flooring in bedrooms. Sing along with the radio. Finish new 'noodle warmer' for Krieg. Take Riley to groomer. Diana's b'day gift. CPR renewal class. Write in blog. Vacuum & dust. Vet appointment for cats. Be sensible but not too serious. Call for referral appointment. Order blinds for living room. Pick up material for drapes. Check prices for rental car. Remember to laugh. Water plants.

It seems my life is defined by my 'to do' lists. Is it a list of what needs to be done or a list of things that really do not matter - that's for me to figure out. Sad but true.

My family tells me I'm the organizer. I think at times I enable their disorganization because they know I'll figure it out. When there is an extended family gathering I wait to see who will start the ball rolling. It doesn't matter. Advanced planning isn't for everyone.

Life is a list. You make the choices to do what is most important from your list.

Free Falling

We have 3 grown children. The oldest and youngest are following their dreams with scholastic endeavors at the University of Idaho. Our middle child (and oldest son) lives near us with his wife and 18 month old son. He got out of the Navy this summer and started working in construction, roofing to be exact, the Monday after he was discharged.

While I grew up my dad was self employed as a carpenter. It's hard work. I know there is satisfaction from doing a hard day of labor and do not begrudge Matt's employment. As a parent you always hope your children will be successful AND enjoy their work. However, the combination of Matthew and this particular job caused me inner panic at times.

As a little boy, Matt was always the one to fall of his bike, the day before pictures, and have a huge road rash on his cheek or the goose egg on his forehead. There was the 'turtle lip' and chipped teeth, from a header over the bike handle bars (but it was near Halloween and he was going to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle so it added to his costume). Yet for all the blood shed, he never had stitches.

Matt is a creative soul. Right brained. Whether he's drawing up pictures of wildlife, designs for new tattoos or cars, he's got a plan. Well, what he needed last week was a parachute!

Matt was working on a rooftop which had two levels. He was climbing from the lower roof to the upper roof and instead of securing a foot on top of a solid surface he hit air and dropped 18' to the lower roof. One foot landed hard into a nearby wheelbarrow and the other hit the ground. His head met with an edge sharp enough to give him a gash and his hand, still in the glove, was cut on a piece of sheet metal.

Matt is 6'4 and just under 200 lbs. Not someone who can be easily 'fireman carried' down a ladder. Actually I'd pay to see that... but I digress. Three fire engines arrived with the paramedics. They ended up repelling Matt down off the rooftop with their basket and ropes.

Once again our family needs to drop to our knees and thank the Lord for looking out for one of us. Matt never lost consciousness. No bones were broken. The doctor referred to his finger as partially amputated though he didn't lose it. The muscle and tissue is twisted and mangled. Matt has 3 stitches in the end of the finger where it was actually cut. The finger was eased back together and wrapped for healing. Both legs were black and blue and badly swollen. The left foot is in an air brace and wrapped. The right foot wrapped and in a boot. He is unable to put any pressure on the legs so is confined to scooting around in a wheelchair.

He went to the Orthopedic surgeon this week for second x-rays. They confirmed no broken bones. He will have an MRI later this week to determine if there is any ligament or muscle damage and to what extend.

While housebound we will be teaching Matthew the lessons of Sir Isaac Newton and the not so recent discovery of gravity!

Seriously, we realize how very blessed we are the damage wasn't more serious or permanent. My prayers of thanks are becoming repetitive. We know that he will heal and be back up to his full frame in a few weeks.

In all this there had to be a lesson learned... Matthew - you'll have to stick the dismount if you strive for the gold medal! Love you Papi!

Rhetorical ?'s - No Answers

What is the value of ignoring someone when you are upset. In reality no one wants to be confronted but you certainly don't want to go on making matters worse either. Sometimes it takes time to sort out what was said or done or to understand why it stung. How does the offender apologize or change their ways if they go on unaware something upset you. Maybe it was misinterpreted and not meant in the way it was received. We don't always know what is happening. Of course we aren't mind readers either. Is your burden truly something worth confining into the crevices of your heart or would someone be able to help you carry the load if you shared? It's a grown up thing... sit down and talk one on one. Talk about what matters. Listen to what is said.

Where do we stand in the big scheme of things? Are we really a united family-type group or is it just what we say to onlookers when it's convenient? Do we make ourselves available to others if they choose to reach out? Shouldn't we be able to seek comfort when we are down or need a shoulder? Is the tie that binds you together just those you were raised with? Do you have to share parents? What if you have shared losses? Is it about control or who's in charge? What about time together? During the holidays are you inviting others to share your time?

When do you finally say enough is enough? At what point do you decide if someone wants to be a part of your life they can make the effort - or at least meet you halfway. This is not an easy decision and in time you want to throw your hands in the air and shout 'uncle'. You hope traditions will continue but you see things slipping away. Sometimes you try to rekindle tradition or create new and you hit a wall. You ask yourself what has changed but uncertainty is the only answer. How many invitations go unaccepted before you no longer extend them? How many times do you come up with the plan so everyone can spend time together? OR When do you stop and inventory what has gone wrong and try to mend fences? Perhaps what you thought was a big deal at the time really isn't as important now. Is it time to reevaluate and call someone you haven't shared with in a while? Is it time for them to answer? Time to move forward?

Why do phone calls or messages go unanswered? It seems a common courtesy you would extend to a family or friend. It's the age of texting, emails and cell phones. Snail mail long forgotten. Just a quick note or returned call just to acknowledge 'hey it's crazy here but I got your message'. It's understandable there are times you don't feel like talking. Does the continued seclusion make matters any better or is it self-pity festering the problem?

Who doesn't enjoy receiving gifts in the mail or an unexpected package? It's nice for the sender to know the package arrived. Everyone is busy. How much time would it take to send a quick email acknowledging you got the package or a thank you for the gift after the sender thought to send it.

Yes... lots of questions. No Answers. Maybe it's the time of year. Holidays approaching. Money disappearing. Election impending. Nerves on edge. Tempers flaring. Name calling. Finger pointing. Everyone is tired. Worried.

Call me old fashion. I just want the creature comforts. My family. My good friends. Less anxiety and more pleasantries. A simple returned phone call. An answered email. Even a thank you.

And in case I haven't said it often enough 'thank YOU'!.

Front End Work

I'm at work and making reminder calls for the next day when the phone rings. I answer with "office voice" and have a gentleman on the phone. Right off the bat I am thinking he has a wrong number - we don't get a lot of calls from men. I can also tell he's not paying attention because he jumps into a story about how he has a Jeep Liberty, had it in for warranty work and there is still a problem. He's on the verge of going off the deep end... you can just tell.

I gently interrupt him, "excuse me sir, if I may...". I go on to tell him which hospital clinic he as contacted. There is a long pause (you could feel the heat rising to his face). He tells me he was certain he called the number they gave him. I explained that unless he wanted a mammogram for the Liberty we weren't going to be able to help him with his vehicle. Again, silence. He stutters a minute. I get out the phone book and look for the phone number of the company he meant to call. I tell him - we do front end work here but not the sort he was seeking. He chuckles.